FEMA blames Louisiana's gluttony for low MRE levels‏

FEMA's argument, contained in a retort to comments made by Louisiana governor Bobby Jindal last week, is that basically the responsibility for the problem lies with the storm victims of Louisiana, who gobbled up food and water at an "extraordinary" rate after Gustav swept through."

The governor made it clear that "it is nutty to tell the people of south Louisiana that we are simply eating too much and are choosing MREs over our terrific local cuisine," Jindal's spokeswoman Melissa Sellers said.

Hi, this is SkitzoLeezra of Louisiana reporting AND because I am a south Louisiana girl, I KNOW WHY so many MREs were taken: Hunters and campers now hoard them! You heard me, MREs are the perfect self-contained and chemically heated camp food and everybody wants them or knows someone who wants them. AND folks buy and sell MREs on eBay! Grab 'em while you can!

Rita Evacuation & Aftermath

Hello Good People!

Well, we evacuated on Thursday to travel north to Natchitoches, Louisiana. The usual 2 hour trip took 10 hours. 120 miles away and we still had powerful winds, downed trees and electricity outages.

My front yard tree is down but no loss, it was a stupid looking tree anyhow. Lots of shingles off my roof, now in the pool. Sections of the fence are down. One very yucky water stain on the living room ceiling where the attic vent cover blew off and rain fell directly into the house. Luckily, no water damage to furniture or carpet. Power has been off for 10 days now.

This single girl lost condiments only as there were no food stuffs in the 'frig. The frozen vodka has suffered. I found a home for the room temperature beer.

The FEMA folks handed out MREs, ice and water here in our area of Louisiana. Woo hoo! Good looking military boys handing out ice! My brother Rollo asked them if they ever sang "ice, ice, baby" but the young Army buck said that he had too much self respect to sing Vanilla Ice tunes while performing his assigned duties.

I foolishly stayed in my house Monday evening thinking I would catch a breeze through the open window. Um, no. I sweat my balls off. Ya know how a big dog cools off by submerging in a water filled laundry tub? That was me. Rollo hooked up a generator and window unit and we were able to sleep in front of it for 3 nights before I shagged my ass to Houston to enjoy air conditioning and restaurants and ice. God bless Danielle for providing hospitality!

Our city advised us to bury any thawed meat products. Rollo and I had many a laugh about his "meat hole" and how much time it took to pack it and we wondered if it were somehow wrong to place cheese in your meat hole. Lots of sweating over the meat hole, I tell ya.

Good riddance to Rita.
The only 'ritas were like are MARGARITAS!