Monday, February 25, 2008

Oscar 2008 Review

Hello All!
Greetings from SkitzoLeezra!

Pre-show thoughts:

Merv Griffin once stated that large heads work well for television. If true, someone get John Travolta his own show because that man is sporting a huuuuge melon! Perhaps the size is amplified due to his spray-on hairline.

Hal Halbrook looks like every cranky old man villain on Scooby Doo.

Miley Cyrus has a weird smirk/smile and I hope that her bright future includes dental braces.

Lisa Rinna wisely stuck to nude color lipstick on that face labia of hers.

Viggo Mortenson was unrecognizable.

Had to mute the pre-show with Lisa Rinna and that Joey the Ass Clown Fatone. Ugh, somebody bring back Joan, sans Melissa!

Keri Russell will age well, mark my words.

Jennifer Garner is pretty, as usual.

Jennifer Hudson - RACK-a-rama!

Everyone must now stop using the word "bling". Just stop.

Helen Mirren, pretty in red and ecru lace gown. Love her smooth cute bob.

Faye Dunaway is a good looking old broad but maybe a bit too long hair, too tight clothing? Your call.

Write it down, Calista Flockheart and Harrison Ford give me the vibe of a couple on the verge of a split. You heard it here first.

Gary Busey was good to confuse Lisa Rinna with questions about herself. I think he planned to throw off her whole rhythm with self absorption.

Heidi Klum is wearing red yet again. What is it, third year in a row?

Cameron Diaz might be a bit too minimal with no gloss, no jewels, no coif. Your call.

Michael Moore seems to have morphed into a large pelican. Lots of fish in that chin pouch.

Okay, Oscar ceremony:

Daniel Day Lewis and Johnny Depp, you should know that the last celebrity spotted chewing gum at the Oscars was Heath Ledger. Something to think about.

Jon Stewart is more relaxed this time around. Good job.

Brad Bird had a funny acceptance speech.

Ugh, the musical performances! This is what gives award shows a bad name. How's about short clips from the film?!

I don't understand Cate Blanchett's gown. The beading in the middle, what is that? And the glitz on the skirt?

Alright guys, if you approach steps with no handrail along with a gal wearing high heels and a long flowing gown, it is CORRECT to extend a steadying hand. Your mothers taught you better.

Enjoy the past winner compilation clips.

TiVo, my life partner, lets me enjoy frame-by-frame reactions.

Owen Wilson's nose reminds me of Joe Camel's. Wonder about receiving oral sex from him . . . .

Ugh, more Bee shit? Jerry Seinfeld is like a freaking carnival barker with that overhyped movie.

Winners, RUN down that damn aisle! Your time is running out!

No way Tilda Swinton had any idea that she would win. Otherwise, she might have applied a swipe of lip gloss or put on earrings. Cute speech.

That French chick Marion Cotillard - awwwww, great thoughts.

From 1928, I have seen 62 of the 80 best pictures. Wow. Have missed 5 since 2000.

Renee Zellwegger's cute short 'do makes me wanna grab the scissors and start snipping my hair. Oh, I remembered the Louisiana humidity. Nevermind.

Nicole Kidman looks good for a 60 year old broad. Except that she is 41. Yikes. Too stiff, too tight, too preternaturally coiffed.

Nice eulogy words for folks that have passed on - "their work is done".

My work here is done. Please post YOUR thoughts.

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